A Pure White Rose.

My gardener 

Your touch, unknown 

Innocent meadow frolics was the under-tone.  

The expressions all hidden with play; 

As a child's youth wiped and lead astray.

Commanding whispers ,

now siren .

Angry warning chants from tree tops; 

to a past me ,

A young me .

A bubbly insecure ,

A Lost me . 

The early discovers of this not so intriguing world; 

Astounded and bewildering .

The thoughts were 

New and interesting, 

Yet this disease is frosted over with 

Bonds of trust .

Hangman-tied up with 

Bonds of blood 

Of loyalty.

Vanilla sugar coated with routine.

A life time later and the score is set. 

The seeds of vile infestation have grown, bountiful in their new living form. 

But no living being knows how this once pure white rose now sources; 

From its roots only black poisonous sustenance it seeps .

From its smell the rose is presently temptuoes. 

Its appearance, none can go past .

Its being, wanted by all. 

It is cut and nothing.It is cut deeper. 

And there bleeds black. 

Black clotted blood, 

That drips slow and sad. 

All that is planted is planted pure. 

The poisoning.

The touch. 

Of that harvested seed, 

Is what we have now. 

Now everything makes sense 

Years and years of suppression 

Of denial 

Of ignorance 

Naivety. 

'Bless you were only a sprout, 

A child,' child' 

All events and emotions for adults 

To play, lose and win at 

Were all things your should have not seen, 

Should have not heard. 

Should have not felt the touch of .

And now the sadness lies with the lost time 

Of youth.

Lost years of confusion and dis-orientation. 

The lost days of hating at all your species.

Lost hours of self justification. 

Through the wrong means, 

Yes that was wrong.

And that was wrong .

And that one. 

And now this being 

Child. 

This Flower, 

Is haunted by the lost minutes 

Of flashbacks. 

The lost seconds of hatefully understanding what was. 

And what shouldn't of been 

Now this white rose is enveloped in the pumping toxic blackening poison within. 

This rose's evil filled thorns are waiting to be cut. 

The stem to be racked off 

Dismembered from the contaminated touch; 

and cut from the grips of this suicidal source that life let's live on,

That is blended with the inner death of innocence 

Bleed out the black.

The numbness. 

The ivy being. 

The touch. 

To bleed out everything that stops this 

Pure 

White 

Rose 

Being 

A 

Pure 

White 

Rose.

Pictures from

http://www.etsy.com/listing/77682170/bleeding-white-rose-original-still-life andhttp://www.ikbis.com/shots/156229?locale=en 

LEARNING.

Im going to learn to drive,
steering well away
from negatives and worries
from down falls and anxiety. Inshallah.

Im going to learn
 to be the best me that i can be,
Insha-Allah.
and not let a simple act slip by,
simply because it can
without being undetected,
 unknown of and unheard of.
for it is not chinese whispers
i fear as i used
to once upon a time
but My Al-mighty, Al merciful Creator.

I'm going to learn
to Sail towards goodness
success and righteousness
Inshallah.
wholly knowing that i have set myself up
to be strong against
inner weakness
exterior superficial challenges
and the deadly whispers of every turn.

I'm going to learn to walk.
Straight .
In the right path that has been chosen for me .
Alhamdulilah.
Not the left
right
intentionally wobbly path
that we all do
walk on
because we all do
and that makes it fine and okay.
Who ever came up with that rationale.

I'm going to learn
to fly with an obedience
for Allah's will as my wings
The Quran and Hadith's
as my fuel
Good deeds, Xasanaad
as my passengers.

Im going to learn
to learn everyday
as our knowledge
and use of that knowledge
will suffice us for the here and the now,
and the universally undeniably
known Here-after .

Inshallah.

Revelations hopes and the seeds to them.

My mind wonders
and my heart pants heavily
as I struggle to live as two.
The one of simplicity and righteousness.
Clear and bright.

And the erratic luxury life
of instant gratification
glutenous laughter
Brassiness of money
success and power.

Moving on from what is routine and normal
is the biggest change of all.
Finding ones self in a world
where every thing goes
not seeking shelter from common
and presently barbaric forms of communal punishment.
Would we think twice about stealing if our right hand would be cut off.
Wouldn't we be petrified if we were out-casted just by not practicing
the basic's which are set in stone.

And the other life is much desired for.
As the mixed being of mind heart and soul;
wishes to be purified.
The dark scoldings over them
to be brightly varnished away
stroke by stroke
footstep to footstep
to bows
prostrating to kneeling
to prayer.

And praying and praying;
for that simple life of contentness
goodness
light of heart
purpose in life
avoidance of evils
actions of mercy
thoughts of clearness
worshiping of the one and only.
As-Samad.
At-Tawwaab.
Al-Azeem.

Yet when I think like this my mind pants and heaves no more
and my heart sets at rest
all becomes clear
and still.
Airy.

Living as was written as one and for only One.
All we can do is walk
Hope.
Pray-steadfast
Believe and we shall wonder no more.

Ameen.