5.16 am Sunday January 2012

Balcony Door.


Trucks.


Birds Chirp.


Haze.


Insomnia.

Random#

I thought life would be boring and


less interesting without you seems the opposite.


Kudo's to new friends new breaths of life


 and cheers to letting go.!

The one that got away.

Should I have let you go. . .

In the palm of my hand. 
Darn, all for just the 
Sense and sensibility of the situation. 

Why so rational and logical . . . 
At such an irrational and illogical age, 
That was before . 
The lust, 
I should have trust 
Yet morals were made in haste. 
Previously calming but now puzzling. 

Should I have let go . . . 
In something that came to me. 
That was mine. 

For a small fraction of time. . 
Or for however long I could have wanted it. 
Reminising over something that hardly started, 
That was hardly there 
But was my choice to ignite the hardly there flame . 
And potentially start and stop 
With a gentle blow through 
these 
innocent 
lips, 
And a simple shrug of my hips. 

Innocent actions 
All for the greater good. 
All for future purpose. 
All for bettering both. 

And what's to show for all that, 
Could have been missed, 
Chosen not to be missed? 

Should I have let u go. . 
In the palm of my hand 
Darn, 
Should. I have let go 
In something that came to me 
That was mine. 
Now all there is this 
Parting was such sweet intimate sorrow 
Reminisce.
Bliss .

Picture byAmanda Kitswell : http://th04.deviantart.net/fs70/300W/i/2011/223/3/e/reaching_by_amandakitswell-d4688i3.jpg

Its Like.

Its like I leaped a little.
Its like I let go;
Of grudges
Past perception.
Let go of routine
The damning killing routines.
Its like I'm fluttering,
Opening up thoughts of
Continuity.
Allowing the continuation of a difference.
Instead of that bland sickening feeling of yesterday repeating itself.

Its like I'm free
Of everything
And everyone.
Lost in my own piece of mind.
Its like my time is here.
And rolling
Calmly
and up ..up..
and away.

Taking solice and joy with what I have
And who I am.
Scratches tainted corners and all.

Its like my heart is whole again and my sense is creeping back.

Its like the essence of me is intensified.
Clarified and strong.

Its like I am happy and content.
Like I am my own best friend.
Its like
I am me again.

BackDated October 2011

PIT

emptiness 

dark

the silence after the storm

the storm of events laughter

sparks, distraction

then

gutsts of cold icy icy

air gushes in the face of conscious sleep

think 

think

were did it go all wrong

was it ever right

okay

okay

then there are no thoughts

just loneliness

awake

aseelp

and inbetween the two

what torture there is without faith

without purpose

and all i want is someone to not

accept

not allow

but support

with harsh rigid scepticism

say

no

you are wrong

you are doing wrong

and not be my friend

as it turns out

i am not even my friend

a partner companion

builder of a rightful pure

purposefull future

but right now

i have to work on a right self

doing right things

and not just thinking of right intentions

alas my friend

we shall feel no pain

or feel nothing

as i once used to

and always will wish.

how do you

how do

u

do u....

BackDated from November9th 2011